Immediately, the idea of emptying myself was banished with the longing to be naked. Nan gave me a large key to Room One, a private shower room with a better shower, a higher bathtub and a nicer wardrobe. Without the slightest joy, I washed as if the body wasn’t mine.
Lying in the dark between Mei and Nan, I couldn’t help recurring fl ashbacks to the horrors of the crowds and the pushes. Cringing at the thought of owing Guo an apology, I suddenly opened my eyes. The darkness fl ashed more terrible memories. Being wildly awake, I felt an impulse to apologize to Nan. “I shouldn’t have ruined such a great dinner that Guo has made many preparations for.”